Hope of a different future

If you really do not enjoy your present then even the hope of a different future can lift your spirits. It gives you a reason to smile everydays because you will be out of the dismal and unsatisfactory life you are leading right now. I have had this hope for months now. The hope of leaving the steel mills and northwest indiana far behind. The hope of finding new friends, a new life and a completely new start. It made me invorigated  to pursue this dream that I saw.

Now I just received a waitlist from wharton, it is not a reject but close to it. I do not really expect much from harvard. So I am back to the uncertainity of the future and the crappy life. I really need to get out of this environment because all it does make me a horrible mean person, which I am not for sure. I am not the nicest person in the world but I am not in the habit of saying mean and spiteful things to people. But that is what I am becoming since I am surrounded by people who are unhappy with their lives and constantly gripe about everything. Makes you want to not come to work at all.

I need my hope of a different future because I can't take this anymore. I am seriously considering just quitting and going home but I am really not brave enough to go face the uncertainty of nothing. I need a goal, something tangible that I see taking shape in the near future. I will come up with something soon and then will be back to spinning webs in my head weaving happy dreams.